On the occasion of the birthday gala of Stefano Masullo, director of the Golf People Club Magazine, which took place in the center of Milan at the famous restaurant Casa Matilde, I had the opportunity to meet Carla Soria, an Ecuadorian mental coach who practices in the Milanese hinterland.
“A better planet is a dream that begins to come true when each of us decides to improve”
(Mahatma Gandhi)
(Once upon a time …)
That morning, like many others, I went to work early. I admired the sparkling fields from the car thanks to the first rays of sun which timidly reached the grass strewn with frost of spring. I liked arriving at the office early, having my ristretto coffee from the vending machine and enjoying it after sitting at my desk. I had not turned on the computer that day when the phone rang.
“Hello Mrs. Soria, as usual, the supplier Alfa delivered the goods to us late and as the delivery date of the finished products they confirmed that initially provided for in the contract”, informed the manager in a tone a little annoyed and excited!
“We will try to do our best Mr. Bianchi, don’t worry. I contact them immediately and resolve the issue. “I replied calmly in the hope of easing the tension.
These situations occurred fairly regularly and were often the source of disagreements between workers. As the administrator of the company, I was desperate to find a method that could help me deal with these situations. I wanted to be able to understand people’s minds and help them achieve their goals with sincerity and absolute tranquility.
Carla Soria was born into a large family with eight brothers and sisters. As her father was often away for work, she spent most of her time with her mother, an optimistic, philanthropic and very creative woman who taught her to live intensely every day. She also taught him that listening to, respecting others and finding the right answers is essential to solving everyday problems with a smile.
This allowed her to develop communication skills which led her to be completely open to others.
She decided to study communication sciences and to specialize in human rights, public policies, gender studies and intercultural education.
Thus, was born her vocation: to become a mental coach and to literate people, to discover their emotional intelligence in order to improve their lives.
She followed a Master in mental coach at Bocconi University in Milan and Coaching in Optimism at the Institute of Humanology in Bern between 2017 and 2018. She deepened the studies of Martin Seligman, the famous American psychologist who developed Daniel Goleman‘s positive psychology and emotional intelligence, who developed methods for getting to know each other better.
After her training, she started practicing as a mental coach and focused in particular on literacy in emotional intelligence and coaching in optimism. Thus, she began to carry out political training courses in Culture of Peace and Emotional Intelligence, courses on the recovery of positive energy, self-esteem and self-awareness, courses for children to teach them to recognize their emotions and finally courses for entrepreneurs on the management of emotional intelligence.
But let’s try to understand what a mental coach is and what it is for?
The mental coach is a qualified professional figure who, through a frank and sincere dialogue with the client, listens day after day, asks the appropriate questions, provides the tools, methods and techniques to build a program that contains real objectives and achievable. It does not say what people should do, but it serves as a guide in creating a kind of emotional well-being that helps overcome difficulties and resolve conflicts.
He is a mental skills coach who teaches continuously and systematically how to better observe emotions and considerations in the face of change or innovation. Thanks to an orientation and a positive comparison, it allows you to become more aware, to increase self-confidence, to be more motivated and finally to be aware of the improvements made.
It helps to seek a new way of being, a new way of acting through the acquisition of a higher degree of awareness and responsibility, through fundamental techniques that allow you to work and to chart the appropriate path to achieve goals and results. All this thanks to visualization, self-awareness, internal dialogue, self-regulation, attention, concentration and neuro-linguistic programming (NLP).
NLP is the synthesis of the best existing strategies in terms of thinking and behavior.
We talk about programming because it studies and acts on the programs that each one subjectively develops in his head according to the education received, the environment in which he grew up and the lived experience.
Neuro because it acts neurologically on the synaptic connections of the brain which are closely linked to thoughts, emotions and behaviors. In fact, repeating a certain behavior strengthens it in the neurological circuit.
Linguistics because it analyzes language, the most powerful means of communicating with ourselves and with others. Words are the verbal fruit of the development of the mind on the basis of the reality that we live daily.
All this must be accompanied by good physical exercise to achieve the right balance between body and mind. In fact, body training increases the connection with our mind, allowing us to keep the body healthy and to avoid various discomforts. With physical activity, serotonin, dopamine and endorphins are produced, which are the neurotransmitters that make us happy and improve our mood.
The mental coach is essential when the need arises, the motivation and the desire to improve to flourish. For this reason, its main objective is to get people to see everything from a different angle in order to find the right path to follow. It helps to see obstacles and difficulties as normal processes for achieving its goals. Create the perfect conditions to express your talents and finally recommend a way of life, a philosophy to explore and make the best use of the extraordinary capacities of the mind in everyday life.
The mental coach intervenes not only at the professional level, but also in the private problems of daily life which can negatively affect our lives: stress management, improvement of work performance, family, study, desire to recover the load and energy positive, improve social skills, recognize and manage emotions.
In the last 10 years, this profession has become more and more important and the demand increases more and more, various specializations have appeared.
Here are the best known:
– Life coach is a person who fully follows the client. This helps him improve the quality of his life from a personal, emotional, financial and health point of view. A life often endangered by chronic unhappiness, panic attacks and relationship difficulties within the couple or at work.
– Mental sports coach. He is entrusted with both athletes who have to overcome a difficult moment of competition and more ambitious athletes who want to achieve extraordinary goals.
– Business Coach. This coach is requested by managers and entrepreneurs who wish to improve their self-esteem in order to obtain excellent financial and commercial results.
– Wellness coach. This professional is concerned with improving not only the physical well-being of his client, by taking care of nutrition and physical activity, but also of emotional and relational well-being.
In light of what is written, we can summarize the things that can be learned from a mental coach:
- learn to manage emotions
- achieve personal and professional goals
- communicate in a winning way
- prepare your mind for daily challenges with others and with yourself
- live the present
I recommend everyone to contact a mental coach for extraordinary results, but above all to learn to be happy and live in the present moment, taking advantage of life experiences at all times.
The meeting with Carla enlightened me on a profession which until now was somewhat unknown to me and on the benefits, it can bring to the society which we live in.
I will end with a sentence by an unknown author that I found on the Internet and which reflects a lot my way of thinking.
“The past no longer exists and there is no need for regrets, the future does not yet exist and there is no need to worry, the present is a gift and must be lived fully! “
