Sanremo, February 6, 2020 – “Festival of Italian song“.
I am with my friend Alessandro Bigarrelli in the entrance hall of the Ariston theater. Together, we share our impressions of this Festival, which is in its 70th edition. Inside rehearsals are taking place in preparation for the third evening which will be broadcast on RAI1.
– Alessandro, let’s take a break, I’d like a coffee. What do you think about it? Are you coming with me or are you waiting for me here in the press room?
– Excuse me but I prefer to wait here, usually I only have coffee in the morning. Do not worry! I will wait for you here on this comfortable chair, said Alessandro.
I arrive at the counter of the Ariston Theater bar and realize that there were lots of artists sipping their coffee and chatting about rehearsals.
– Ah, le Parisien?, said a voice behind. I turn around.
It was Mika, the well-known singer and showman, who with a big smile sat next to me. He put his elbow on the bar counter and seeked the bartender’s attention.
– Oh yes! “I thought it was an original way to get your attention when we met outside before entering Ariston! Apparently, it worked!” I said in amazement.
– I would say yes! , he answers in French, laughing.
– What can I offer you? Mika asks me
– You’re welcome? Bahhh! Me?
– I take a “Spritz” and you?, he asks me with conviction.
– Well, then take two! I answer completely confused.
As I sip the drink, I express my gratitude to him while he asks for my opinion on the Festival.
After a few minutes …
– Excuse me, Pier, I have to go to rehearsals now! See you soon!
– Ok Mika! Thank you very much!
I go back to Alessandro and …
– “Mika, that doesn’t seem true to me” I tell him with my eyes out of my head.
– Have you seen Mika? And?
– At the bar! Honestly, I never imagined he was so simple!
– He offered me a drink! We met in front of the Ariston and seeing me at the bar with ease, he offered me an aperitif.
– Great!
– Well, back to us!
One word I have heard in several songs is “resilience“. We’ve been talking about it lately.
But do we know the meaning of the term?
In fact, although few people still use it, you can read and find the word “resilience” everywhere. Recent and last but not least is the text of the song brought to the festival of Sanremo by Rita Pavone, entitled “Niente (resilience74)”. We listen: – Hit harder, you do not see that I am still standing / You do not see that it is useless! / You never knew how to break me, submerge me / I stay here in thick wood / And your wind will not bend me.
The reference to the artist’s career is obvious, stubborn and proud, she returns to the game. However, the content of the text goes far beyond. In fact, she tells us about a person who, despite violence and abuse, despite strong disappointments, and who may also have gone through depression, finds in her the will to move forward and the ability to stand up and react. This person asserts herself with pride and regains self-esteem, the fundamental thrust that allows rebirth and the reconquest of himself, in a word, resilience.
In the common sense, being resilient means bringing out your character, showing your teeth and asserting yourself; for some, resilience also resides in the courage to respond to injuries with kindness. According to the scientific approach, in clinical psychology, the resilient person is that person capable of responding positively and constructively to stress, capable of resisting adversity with flexibility and capable of recovering and recovering from painful events without excessive difficulty. The calls to work on resilience are not only people suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, but all victims of burnout (for harassment, harassment, bullying), those people who are no longer able to put an end to negative responses to brain stress. To awaken and build resilience, it is necessary to have a specific objective: the meaning and the meaning of the objective help people to better face the challenges of life.
Resilience mechanisms already begins in the dyadic relationship with the mother or caregiver in which resilience is characterized by the ability to manage the transition from a positive effect to the negative, and then back to the positive again. It is during adolescence, a period of strong and heartbreaking contradictions, that the individual, reaching full physiological maturity and becoming aware of having psychological and relational resources and skills, significantly increases its resilience to stressful and negative events. In doing so, he uses so-called protective and defense factors (of a more psychological and individual nature). 
The protective factors will then collide and compare with the risk factors (of a relational and social nature). Be careful though. Chronological age is not that important in itself: children, adolescents, young men and adults are on the same level. To be resilient, an important role is played by the favorable conditions of the environment, the type of lived experience and the individual ability to know how to incorporate and interpret it, i.e. the balanced relationship between the internal control of the ego and the optimal reaction to the challenges and demands posed by the environment.
In the end, to be resilient, you have to know yourself and accept yourself, and thus set out on the path that will lead from frailty to strength, sadness and depression to a happy smile, from suffering adversity to the courage to face it, to ruminate and to get angry in vain when letting run lightly, to complain because you feel down to stand up with pride.
Mika also on the occasion of a trip he made to the ISIS refugee camps from the war in Syria expressed to Corriere della Sera:
“The two words that are fixed in my mind, after a week after my visit, are” resilience “and” tenderness “. The resilience in the face of impressive challenges and the human tenderness that a person must possess in order to survive while keeping his humanity intact. If you harden, you risk breaking under the blows of violence. This is the only way to fight terror. Resilience and tenderness together are the most powerful qualities man has. Both are a cancer for terror and a comfort for those who have lost so much “
